YGWYG

Recently we were having supper and EG said his teacher had told his classmate Lucy "You get what you get and you don't throw a fit." We are not sure if Lucy is an actual classmate or EG's alter ego, because his stories about Lucy often involve her doing something slightly naughty like taking his hat or complaining about her snack. She then gets reprimanded with something like "You get what you get..." or "Y tu tiempo se acabo (...and your time is up)!"

EG's anecdote changed my life. After that, if he whined about getting water when he wanted juice, I just used "You get what you get and you don't throw a fit." and it shut him down. Then I used it on the dog. And horses: "Here's your alfalfa." "We want grass!" "YGWYGAYDTAF!" Shuts 'em right down.

It's not just a phrase, it's a new outlook. What if it's 4:30 on Friday, and the QA manager wants you to revise some code you wrote, because the marketing guy thinks you can do it in 10 minutes? Drop a YGWYGAYDTAF. Shut 'em down.

Black Walnut Raspberry Cookies (vegan)

Looks like the one on top got too much frosting. Oops. I came up with this recipe by tweaking a basic sugar cookie recipe until it no longer even faintly resembled the original, so can I take credit for it? Then again, the reviews on this aren't all in yet so I might not want to. This recipe if for 5000-6000 feet so it will be different at sea level.

Dry ingredients:

3.5 cups white whole wheat flour (or combination of white and whole wheat, or whole wheat pastry flour); at sea level, start with 3 cups

0.5 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt

Wet ingredients:
0.5 cup Earth Balance Vegan Buttery Spread (1 stick)
0.5 cup ground walnuts (grind in a mini-prep or coffeegrinder until almost like peanut or almond butter)
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup agave syrup
0.5 teaspoons black walnut extract (saw this at the spice store, and that's why I came up with this - wanted an excuse to use it)
Optional: add a half cup or more of chopped walnuts; I didn't, because I wanted to be able to roll out the dough

1. Whisk together dry ingredients.
2. Cream Earth Balance and brown sugar until light tan color and fluffy, then add syrup and extract and mix thoroughly.
3. Add dry ingredients no more than a half cup at a time, or there will be flour all over the walls in your kitchen.
4. Chill dough in fridge for at least an hour, or freeze for longer storage.
5. Preheat oven to 365 F (I think this translates to 350 at sea level).
6. Roll out dough to the same thickness you would gingerbread cookies (no I did not measure) and cut whatever shapes you want; mine are fairly uniform 1.5 inch circles because I wanted to make sandwich cookies.
7. Bake for 9 minutes - or at least that's what I found was perfect for mine.
8. Cool and frost with this raspberry frosting/filling:

1 stick Earth Balance
2 teaspoons raspberry extract
Around 2 cups confectioner's sugar (if you are seriously vegan, get organic or a brand that doesn't whiten sugar with bone char)
Coconut, almond or soy milk to thin frosting if needed

Freeze in an airtight container or freezer bag for at least a day and they will soften when they thaw.

I'm not sure how I feel about this. The cookies are good and not too sweet, but the frosting is like candy. I might try a maple filling for the next batch but I was in the mood to experiment with a nut and berry flavor combination and had high hopes for it. I don't know if it's worth suggesting you buy these two extracts if you're never going to use them again, so I'll try to come up with some additional uses for raspberry and black walnut.

Biggest losers

We love to watch The Biggest Loser. We've been watching it for like 6 years and I really miss Jillian. Bob's still there though. I've often wondered how he feels about promoting products like ground turkey (Bob Harper is a vegan, as far as I know). I probably would make that compromise too, for a job like he's got. There's no getting around conflicts like this and you have to decide for yourself where to draw the line. For all the healthy habits the show promotes, however, they accept sponsors from the dark side. For example:

-Disposable diaper manufacturers: I think it's the popular brand (name rhymes with Hampers) that shows happy babies and toddlers giggling in broad daylight because they're wearing 'sposies with "TWELVE hour protection." I think we know who's being protected for 12 hours - parents. I'm hoping at least this is for nighttime use, although from the commercials it would appear it's for allowing kids and their caretakers to be in denial of elimination for an entire day. Don't tell me someone isn't tempted to do this on a long car trip, a to skip a few bathroom/diaper changing breaks because the label says the kids should be OK for 12 hours.

-Extra sugar-free gum: It's probably fairly harmless, but healthy? Would Bob chew it?

-Cheap ground turkey: sure, it's lean meat, but as the flesh of miserable, factory-farmed mutant animals I can't call it healthy. Or wholesome. Would Bob eat it? I like this article about turkeys which is written from a diner's perspective - not a vegetarian one - and even a meat eater can be disturbed by the industry and its creepy products as well as the poor Frankenbirds.

But back to Pampers or Huggies or whatever. I hate to use the phrase "slippery slope," because all slopes are somewhat slippery, but how did so many parents come to, um, depend on these? And  pullups designed to help kids as old as 5 avoid using a toilet - these will surely have serious effects on this generation. Will we have them for grownups to wear in meetings so they won't have to hear the obnoxious phrase "bio break" during a 4-hour, 800-slide presentation about Six Sigma and ROI?

Lineup

Sadly, this pic was taken through a dirty window that's never going to be clean. These house finches and house sparrows line up on the fence at sunrise while we eat breakfast and politely take turns at the bird feeder:

Tweet

 

Breakfast was leftover vegan cornbread that I de-veganized by making it into French toast. I soaked slices in a mixture of 2 eggs, 1/4 cup rice milk, cinnamon and a tablespoon of agave syrup and cooked in Earth Balance. Eggs courtesy of Bertha the white chicken.

Breakfast for EG and me

Here's a pretty lame pic from my phone of breakfast I made for EG and me - omelet, cornbread and tomato (the tomato's just for me; he doesn't like them). Why would I bother posting a photo of breakfast? Because the eggs are from the hens I help care for and they just started laying recently. These were from a New Hampshire Red hen named Little Jerry. The omelet is made from 2 eggs, about 2 tbs. almond milk, salt, pepper, and a Golden Jubilee tomato.

The cornbread recipe is adapted from the Bob's Red Mill cornmeal package. Mine has gluten but Bob's recipe doesn't - gluten free recipe can be found here .

Preheat oven to 350 F at sea level, 365 at 5000-6000 ft elevation. Grease a 9x13 pan.

Whisk together these dry ingredients:
1 1/4 cup cornmeal
1 cup white whole wheat flour or mix of WW flour and oat flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt

Mix wet ingredients at medium speed (it's ideal if they're all room temperature):
2 eggs or egg substitute
1 cup milk (I used almond milk)
1/3 cup oil (I used olive oil)
1/4 cup some kind of sugar (I used brown rice syrup)

Once wet ingredients are completely mixed, gradually add the dry stuff, beating on low speed until incorporated. Don't overmix. It will be the consistency of cake batter. Then stir in extras if you want. I used a can of sweet corn, because it was on the shelf and needed a purpose. You could use chopped up roasted chilis or other peppers, roasted corn scraped from the cob, pineapple tomatilloes (I grew a lot of these little things - they taste just like pineapple) or anything, really.

Bob's instructions say to bake for 25-30 minutes, but mine took 35.

Safety First

You see, when watching Fireman Sam, it's important to stay safe. Pants optional.

No that is not leather furniture.

How to get a workout at the barn

Just like when I was 16, I am always at someplace called The Barn, or talking about what happened at The Barn. I don't shower in the morning and go to an office anymore. There's no point in showering before 6 p.m. and when I do, hay often falls out of my bra.

I told a friend who is a personal trainer I couldn't afford to go to the rec center more than once a week to work out anymore, but still managed to work out at home and at the barn. She was impressed. Thought I was pretty hard core to squeeze in a workout at the barn. I realized then that not everyone does barn chores, not even all horse owners, so they don't know what a great opportunity it is to either get fit or get hurt. Here's how I lost 6 pounds this summer (doesn't sound like a lot, but hey - six pounds is six pounds):

1. Mucking stalls and pens. Mucking itself isn't that hard, but use the big wheelbarrow and fill it all the way. Jog while pushing it to the manure pile, and see how high up on the pile you can get. That's right, I said run up a mountain of sh!t. Then turn the wheelbarrow completely over to empty it. If your form is good and you've filled it up enough, your hamstrings and lower back will feel like you've done serious dead lifts. I need to get photos of this to demonstrate because I can't describe it well.

2. The general rule is No Running in the Barn, but you can run between the barn and turnouts. Our routine involves bringing horses in and turning some out, and the turnouts are spread about the property. So you can save a little time and burn a few calories running between them. I don't recommend running at the horse in the pasture because you'll freak him out and chase him off. And I don't usually jog with the horse in hand either because they'll get nervous, wondering what the hurry is. Although I do sometimes jog a horse in hand or ground drive him (like driving without a cart - you must walk or jog behind) as part of his training. You can score a mile or two per horse this way. However, this often means running in boots. I have no problem with it on soft ground but your mileage may vary.

3. Stacking hay. This shouldn't require explanation. Hay bales are big, awkward and weight about 40 pounds. Good form is essential or you will wind up with a herniated disk.

4. Grooming. Think Karate Kid: wax on, wax off. A mild workout for your triceps and delts.

5. Riding. A half hour lesson is usually enough to make my adductors pretty sore, because I don't ride enough. If you think riding isn't a workout, take a lesson from my instructor.

It's still summer

Never fear, Blueberry Man is here

The sun feels good

 I'm particularly happy with the way this photo turned out, and he actually was wearing pants:

This child appears completely innocent, but is probably not wearing pants

Eats

 Here's a lovely oat flour waffle that Masher makes.

Like a square foot garden, but square inches and not a garden

Children like waffles

The recipe is something like this (vegan alternatives included):
-2 cups any combination of oat and whole wheat flour
-2 cups some kind of milk (coconut, soy, rice, cow)
-2 chicken eggs or Ener-G egg substitute (or replace egg with banana at half a banana per egg); if using duck eggs 1 will do
-3 tbs melted and cooled Earth Balance or butter
-2 tsp baking powder (this is for high altitude)

 Here's my lunch: Sun Gold cherry, Stupice, Cherokee Purple, Golden Jubilee

The big ones are Golden Jubilee, Cherokee Purple and Speckled Roma. The little ones are Stupice and Sun Gold. Golden Jubilee is my favorite to grow and eat, maybe tied with Brandywine. Cherokee Purple is a good producer of large, pretty tomatoes that are sweet and mild but a little more watery and seedy than the Golden ones. Stupice plants produce like crazy and the 2-inch fruits taste decent and are bright red. Speckled Roma will impress your friends with their handsomeness and are tasty raw or cooked. They're my favorite for tomato soup.

Yield

 Here's what I picked this morning:

Lunch

 

 

 I have to pick the tomatoes when they're 80-90% ripe because the second they're perfectly ripe, a lurking grasshopper eats them. It's a very successful method of avoiding loss of what I call my "crops." However, on occasion the bugs score one:

The worm crawls in, the worm crawls out

That little caterpillar didn't do much damage. I've only seen two all summer, and since they weren't in the same room at the same time for all I know they were same one. The Speckled Roma on the left has a little blossom end rot too. I have very little trouble with BER but it seems like all Romas are prone to it and there will be one or two on a vine with BER. I would cut that off and cook the rest of the tomato though. I'm not wasting any part of a stripey Roma. They're good for eating raw or cooked, not like some other Romas I've grown. And even the cut off parts don't get wasted because chickens and goats eat them.

 Here's a dog's eye view of some of the square foot gardens:

peppers, greens and tomatoes

spinach, chard, carrots, onions, marigolds and....tomatoes

Chives, pepper and you know the rest

I highly recommend building trellises as described in Mel Bartholomew's book. The heaviest of tomatoes and cucumbers stay high and dry, and the trellises support them easily.

Stupice and cucumber about 4 feet off the ground

Everyone's dreams: grunge, zebras, extra kids

Everyone had interesting dreams last night. EG woke up cheerful and said there were little zebras that came into his room. They were toys and he played with them. He said they had instruments, like they were in a band. He was a little disappointed they were gone when he got up.

Masher dreamed he came home and there were three kids in the house: EG, another toddler, and a three month old infant. I told him that someone couldn't look after the baby anymore, and I couldn't turn him away. In the dream he was furious because I'd adopted these kids without telling him, which was funny because he said he wouldn't actually react that way if I did that. I promised I would give him at least a week's notice if I were coming home with any extra kids.

My dream was fun. We were in Seattle, stopped overnight on our way to San Francisco. I joked that I was hoping we'd run into someone from Soundgarden while we were there, so we must have gone back in time. We drove a rental car over a high bridge and I was terrified of falling off it. That part was scary. Then we went to a small venue, like a warehouse the community used for flea markets and other little events. Masher pointed to a guy and said, "There you go, Chris Cornell is over there." He was set up with only a synthesizer, amplifiers and microphone and was doing an impromptu solo gig. People started gathering. He was dressed like a grunge-era teen and his hair was shaggy like Dave Grohl's. Instead of being brooding like I expected he was cheerful, reaching out and shaking hands with people in the front of the crowd. He did some Soundgarden songs and cover songs from pop bands until something went wrong with his equipment and he called an intermission. There was free pizza during intermission so I got some from Masher and EG. I think this was brought on by surfing XM radio from the Lithium channel to the 90s channel to the classic rock channel, which was represented by our destination being San Francisco. I miss the grunge era like old people miss the 70s. I had long, frizzy hair and my laundry was either a load of blacks or a load of plaids. I deluded myself that I was sexy. Soundgarden still rocks. Alice in Chains has been successfully resurrected. I still have some plaid stuff. Maybe we should have a grunge-themed party, minus the heroin of course. That's the annoying part of the 90s - 4 out of 5 of my favorite songs are about being a miserable junkie. I can't relate. I just like plaid and don't like washing my hair every day.

Monster toddlers

I had a dream last night I came across 2 little vampire toddlers and took charge of them. I was looking for a wizard who could help cure them because they were innocent children and I didn't want an angry mob after them. Meanwhile I put little plastic things on their tiny fangs so they wouldn't bite anyone. If you gave them toys to play with they didn't bother anybody. Finally I found that Blade guy from the movie who would help transform them back to regular toddlers, which are only slightly less dangerous. I guess I got to keep them, but I don't know because it was after 5 a.m. and I had to wake up. I did not feel refreshed when I got out of bed. This probably happened because we were talking about Halloween and costumes, not because of EG's behavior.

Victor got up shortly after, ate porridge, and played with toys; he brought me a lego pizza, saying proudly that it has no cheese on half (we order ours that way so I can eat the non-dairy half). He also threw his flash cards down the stairs, but that was good because while we were picking them up I discovered he could read the numbers on them - they went up to twelve. Also he brought a load of straw into the kitchen. All this and more before 7 a.m. I really needed that window between 5 and 7:30 to work and was counting on him sleeping as late as he usually does. Well, it's good to know he doesn't have fangs and is really not evil at all.

EG's recipe suggestion this week is tomato smoothies.

 

Coconut milk instructions

I want to try this:

Homemade Coconut Milk

posted by Penniless Parenting at Penniless Parenting

For drinking or cooking I like the fortified unsweetened coconut milk in a carton, but if you make it with dessicated coconut like Penniless does you can get that rich fatty stuff off the top for vegan whipped "cream." I've made it the whipped topping and it was brilliant. 

Underwear Man

This has nothing to do with the usual blog topics of vegetables, little kids and ponies. Also, it's creepy. I don't know why my brain is working this way, but I have felt compelled to write a poem about this guy since my friend told me about him. See, my friend works in a consignment shop and one Sunday muttered that it wasn't her favorite day of the week because of Underwear Man. Apparently that's the only day she works there alone, and this creepy old guy comes in then and feels and sniffs ladies' undies. Large ones. They're not even used, but that doesn't stop him. I'm not a proper poet, so cut me some slack if you comment.

Underwear Man

Sunday's the day it's just me at the store

I show up on time and unlock the door

to open the register, sort the dresses and scan

size 40 panties for the Underwear Man.

They're not for his wife, nor his lady friend

Too many sizes for one girl's rear end

Fabric blends are his favorite, but pure cotton will do

If they're over size 30, peach, pink or blue

Underwear Man go away
The elastical waistbands are starting to fray

Put the polyester blends back on the shelf
Keep your creepy old hands to yourself

Sunday's the day I see the old fellow

Thumb and forefinger fondling yellow

satin, size 40 briefs so I must scan

Bigger the better, thinks Underwear Man.

Underwear Man go away
The elastical waistbands are starting to fray

Put the polyester blends back on the shelf
Keep your creepy old hands to yourself

A few ripe tomatoes

Left to right: Golden Jubilee, Speckled Roma, some other Roma, Stupice, and a few pineapple tomatilloes

I ate the Golden  Jubilee. All other tomatoes are green and still getting bigger. I don't believe the seed packets that tell you they're early season, mid season or late season, or that they mature in so many days. I think it depends on the microclimates in your garden. I planted everything from seed indoors in early February, put a few out under cloches in April and the rest out the first weekend in June. I never see more tomatoes than these before September no matter what I do and what variety, although there have been a handful of ripe Stupices here and there since July. The Golden and stripey ones are late season. They taste really good and in my four years of trying to learn to garden they've become a mainstay. The Golden Jubilees can show a little cracking because we've had heavy rains but are mostly plump and, um, meaty. The Speckled Romas get big for Romas and are dense with lots of flavor. Like all Romas they're more vulnerable to BER than others in the same container; the plant these came from doesn't show any, however. They are also the least resistant to fungus. I hope we're past that stage. Everything looks pretty lush and hardy (knocking wood). If you don't violate any of the Tomato Rules (don't plant too close, don't overwater, don't water from overhead, don't plant the same place you had tomatoes last year), the stripey Romas will produce lots of pretty fruit for you.

I wish I would grow tons of food and not have to buy vegetables at all, except the ones I don't want to grow because they take too much space (broccoli, cabbage, cauliflower). Mostly I get a lot of tomatoes and squash. Here's the yield or potential yield so far:

-Tomatoes: 22 remaining plants (I culled one that looked like it was developing some kind of wilt), 19 actually busting out with impressive fruit.
-Eggplant, Japanese: 4 plants and so far only one eggplant big enough to eat.
-Herbs: basils, oregano, dill and chives; plus we made an her spiral out front and bought lavender, lemon thyme, sage and tarragon plants for it.
-Carrots: small and about 40% seed carrots, and they take all spring and summer to grow. Not the big basket of orange carrots for horses and people I was hoping for. Yet. I keep planting them.
-Parsnip/parsley root: see carrots. A few, not that impressive.
-Butternut squash: I can see at least 10 on our only plant. These are awesome. One seed is all you need and they store all winter without taking up space in the fridgelator (EG's pronunciation).
-Pumpkin: EG's pumpkin plant is sprawling and there are a few good specimens on it. It's the jack o' lantern kind, not the kind you grow for pie.
-Beans: Around 10 bean plants give us enough green beans for supper weekly. I like to let the black ones and the white ones keep growing and get dried beans from them, but for it to be enough to write home about you need more than I made room for.
-Greens: Swiss chard is easy to grow and we eat in salad or cooked, plus give some to the chickens and goats at the barn, and still always have some ready to pick. Spinach is doing OK.
-Peas: I never get a lot at one time. They are good either picked young or later with fat peas in the pod. I just wish we'd get a lot instead of 1 every other day.

Cucumber salad recipe

I made this for a family reunion party, and people flipped out over it. I thought it was pretty good, but was surprised to see it actually become a topic of conversation. So here's the recipe, which I came up with on the fly using whatever I could find to put together:

1 or 2 cucumbers, chopped into little pieces (I removed the seeds)

1 cup chopped fresh peas, pods and all

1 can artichoke hearts, chopped (just plain, not marinated in dressing)

1 can garbanzo beans, rinsed

handful snipped fresh cilantro

1 cup (or more) cooked little pasta noodles, like anellini (little circles), tiny shells or orzo

1 tsp celery salt (I would have put snipped celery leaves in it if I had any)

salt and pepper

about 3 tbs lemon juice

1 tsp basalmic vinegar (it has to be a pretty good, sweet vinegar; if you don't have a good one leave it out rather than substitute red wine vinegar)

about 3 tbs. olive oil
------
And here are the other things I put on chopped cucumbers in the summer:

1. Lemon juice, pepper, salt and mint
2. Lemon juice, pepper, salt, chives and dill
3. White vinegar, a little apple cider vinegar, salt, tbs. sugar, sliced onion (Masher's recipe)

EG likes all these. He eats up the lemony ones and then drinks the juice left in his bowl, which he says looks like pee. Then he goes around saying he drinks pee and laughs hysterically. I should probably explain this to his teachers in case he says it at school, lest they think he's so dehydrated at home he has to drink urine to survive.

Just cute pics

I wonder if anyone else posts cute little kid pics on their blogs? Probably not. I'm probably the first.

Ganging up on Mommy

What were they thinking when they gave me a piece this size? That I wouldn't finish it?

That garnet-colored melon we scored on a recent trip to Iowa. You just can't grow a watermelon like that here.

Evil Genius's recipe

EG was out in the garden with me this morning and picked a cucumber and a carrot. He said he wanted to make soup with it because he wanted me to get out the stick blender. So this is his recipe:

Carrot, steamed, including the water it was steamed with
Cucumber, peeled
Fresh dill
Salt, pepper

I blended it all in the mini food processor because it was too small a batch for the stick blender. It wasn't too bad. I ate some and EG did too. It looked like baby food, a little.

Kind of a crappy pic I took with my phone.  His next suggestion: peanut butter eggs. I don't know how we're going to pull that off.

Unrelated, but I feel like documenting some EG quotes before I forget them. Here are a few lines he uses to charm girls:

To a little girl at Chili's: "I have a fire truck at my house."
To a plumber's daughter: "Hey girl, show me some tools."

Not everyone is going vegetarian anytime soon.

The most common weakness I hear former vegetarians or lacto-ovo vegetarians admit to is cheese. I understand. It's tasty, it's satisfying and it's ubiquitous. Masher and EG still eat it; they get a pizza with cheese on their half and none on mine. I didn't really have any issues giving it up, but I probably would face a challenge if I had nut allergies. I eat seeds and nuts every day. I also buy Vegan Gourmet brand "cheese" sometimes, but not to fill a void left by the real thing. It's a closer to being a garnish than a main ingredient. Overcheesing is an easy trap for converts, but if I were asked for guidance in transitioning to a plant-based diet I'd rather see them eat a tiny bit of meat occasionally and sever their relationships with dairy.

Many cheeses aren't actually vegetarian unless they contain vegetable rennet. Enzymes used to turn milk into cheese are often sourced from sheep stomachs, so if you get technical about your definition of lacto-ovo you'll only get the vegetable rennet kind. Even so, the only way to get cow cheese is create a calf who will become a by-product and go to slaughter as either a calf, a steer or a cow. I've talked to dairy farmers and there's no way around it. It just doesn't seem worth using all the resources needed to create cheese. According to Mark Bittman's review of "The Meat Eater's Guide to Climate Change and Health" by the Environmental Working Group, " Of 20 common proteins and vegetables analyzed, cheese has the third highest greenhouse gas emissions." We just don't make that association, because it isn't made out of the cow herself, even if it is made *by* the cow. Bittman is a meat eater who chooses to investigate the sources of his food. It's not as fun as it sounds, as he also discusses in his attempts to visit some of the larger farms in the Midwestern U.S.  But that's another topic.

I still don't understand what bottle calves drink. If it's formula or milk replacer, isn't it made out of cow's milk?

Here's a futuristic option, which fascinates me: make meat in a lab. We're talking about any meat, any kind of muscle, which means even human steak would be possible.  I'm not interested in eating meat anymore no matter how it's made, but it's an option that would (gasp!) eliminate ranching while providing beef. I wonder what other scientific or medical side effects could be beneficial from making muscle. A lot of people reacted with disgust at the idea, which is bizarre considering how nauseating a slaughterhouse is. I want to give the guy credit who pursued this with little support and whose interview first made me aware of it, but I can't find or remember his name. Masher read the interview with him on a flight several years ago.

I've read or heard the phrase "Animals aren't people" many times, which is sort of true in that non-human animals aren't people, but let's remember people are animals. We're in the taxonomy. Pigs aren't people as fish aren't birds. We're complicated but we're not that much more special.

Sources:
More weight on less meat:  http://bit.ly/o25e9R
Follow Mark Bittman on Twitter: @bittman

Will lab-grown meat save the planet? http://www.slate.com/id/2191705/

More toddler logic

Poor EG was sick recently, but not for long. After he puked a couple times and scored an hour of watching Fireman Sam from the couch he declared himself all better and resumed normal overactivity. He was thirsty and hungry but we only gave him a little rice and water, so he announced a plan to get himself a little almond milk ("nutty milk") and got the box off the shelf. Before he could open it I warned him a little milk might make him sick. He grinned and said, "How about a whole lot of milk then?"

Barn weasels

I know someone who lucked out and found a family of weasels living in her barn. They keep the mouse population under very tight control. Now she doesn't need a barn cat. I've always felt bad for most barn cats. They like living in a barn but it doesn't always work out. Sometimes they disappear. Weasels are tough as nails - after all, they're related to honey badgers (warning: gross but funny) . They're cute little bastards.

My mommy feeds me mice

Container garden 2011

Last year something that looked like late blight affected our garden bed so we started from scratch this year and built square foot gardens. At first I wasn't crazy about the idea (even though I'm the one who bought the book) because it meant buying stuff to grow in instead of using free dirt. Square foot gardening, if you go by the book, is outdoor container gardening. Here's a photo of the row of SFGs built over what was two long raised beds:

...and here are some tomatoes (Brandywine and Great White) planted deep in big pots:

I started all my seeds indoors on February 7. The ones transplanted into deep, wide containers are much bigger than the others. Still, I'm pretty optimistic about the SFG. I'm not sure I'm joining the cult though.

And here is the first ripe tomato of 2011 on June 26, a Siberia that I bought at Paulino's in Denver. It's one of the few I didn't plant from seed, the others being a Mr. Stripey (my first!), Red Robin and a Sweet Seedless from the farmer's market.

EG and I ate it. I don't think he actually likes raw tomatoes but he wanted to pick it and asked every day if it was red enough yet. I give up trying to rush the tomato harvesting. I experimented with plastic cloches on some pepper and tomato plants that I put out in April while waiting until late May to bring the rest of the seedlings out. The ones brought out early are no bigger than any others. This box has the ones that were camping out with cloches over them at night in mid-April:

The 3 little plants in the southwest squares have been out since mid-April

The cage keeps our dog from swiping vegetables. She will do an entire agility course for a green bean.

LRM's first show

At my first show over fences and the LRM's first show of any kind (as far as we know), we earned Reserve Champion. Granted, there were only 3 horse/rider teams competing, but that doesn't make me less happy or proud. LRM was excited but kept her head on straight. She settled down when she saw the jumps like she was saying, "Oh, that's why we're here. Jumps. Piece of cake." She had a whole audience of supporters from the barn and liked the applause.

Some Pig

I guess pigs and chickens doing agility isn't all that unusual:

More products I like

-Vegepet supplements by Harbingers of a New Age: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vegepet
-Lush soaps and all their other products  http://www.lushusa.com/shop
-Spectrum all-purpose cleaner: sparkleclean.com - a concentrated, cost effective cleaner we have used on everything from floors to diapers.

Some animal friends

These are some of my animal buddies:


Pix: I adopted this mixed breed dog from Dalmatian Rescue, a wonderful organization that places dogs very carefully with homes they're suited for. She was maybe 10-12 months old at the time and the fastest, most hyperactive animal I've ever seen. She is also obsessed with birds. I put her in obedience and agility training right away to bond with her and get her to focus. She loves work, loves being part of a team. Five years later, she gets as many compliments for her manners as she does for her athleticism.

The Little Red Mare (LRM): My friend has several horses and not enough time to exercise them all, so I get to ride them. LRM was one I initially had last on my list to ride, because she's hot, had a reputation for being pill and made me nervous. She's the boss mare in the field and has twice sent big geldings over a fence to get away from her. Granted, those were bad decisions the boys made. We're talking about the equivalent of Bernadette Peters telling Arnold Schwartzenegger where to sit in a theater, and having him freak out and jump off the balcony. With people, she's sweet and cuddly.

But my friend always said she was loads of fun and I should ride her. When I did, she pranced sideways and tossed her head in impatience. Once she gave me a bloody nose. It was obvious she thought I was boring, so for fun I took her over some little jumps.  She had a cute jump, as it turns out, but would get so amped up at the sight of a jump she couldn't contain herself. After one session with the instructor, she stopped freaking out and has been on a mission to jump like a pro. She has a new career and a place to focus her energy, and my friend was right - she is a blast to ride.  She came from a rescue, so we don't know if she'd been a jumper before. I think she was a barrel racer.

The Off-track Arabian (OTA): This 6 year old mare came from FAWOR Foundation (http://faworfoundation.org), another reputable rescue that retrains, evaluates and rehomes Arabians that had been racehorses. She is the LRM's pasture mate and her polar opposite. Although energetic and spirited, she is sensible and ladylike beyond her years. She was adopted by first time horse owners who are kind enough to let me ride her regularly. She has also started jumping; this video is of one of her very first sessions:

Animals resting in peace:

The Kitty: she is no longer with us in the physical sense. I got this kitty over a decade ago when my roommate, who adopted her from the Human Society, wanted to travel for a year. Long story short, she was with us until recently when her kidneys failed and I took her to the vet to be euthanized. It was not traumatic for her. I have not been very good at explaining it all to EG. He knew she was sick and that we would try to get her to eat, and he would pet her and be very gentle. Once, at breakfast, he paused and pointed to the air to make a point. "The kitty," he said between bites, "is my favorite pet." He wanted to know, physically, where she was the day after I took her to the vet. I said she was at the vet and he asked if she were still sick. I said she was not sick anymore and he was satisfied. He still talks about her but knows she isn't coming home.

The Pony: I got this little grade Arab/pony mare from a family that had gotten her as part of a BOGO deal, meaning they bought an Arab mare and the seller dumped the little filly on them because he didn't want a project. They didn't either and sold her cheap. She was my buddy.  By the time she was 4 1/2 she was a fun pony to ride and I started her over crossrails.  I got a call one morning from the barn owner that she's gotten out of her paddock and was standing, injured, near the hay. I don't know how she got out or what she injured herself on, but took her sedated to the University where they determined the damage to her hind leg was, in short, extensive. I had her put down that day.

The Boxer:
 When I was young and naive I got an adorable puppy from what I now recognize as a backyard breeder. Unlike the dog we have today, she did not get the benefit of professional training and a stable home. She moved across the U.S. with me and then from rental house to rental house until I finally bought my own. She was a good sport and charmed everyone with her sweet nature. At the age of 13, way too young IMO, she was peacefully put to sleep at home after a short battle with a brain tumor.

My dog's vegetarian diet

My dog has been vegetarian for about a year and a half. It took a little research to find these supplements and recipes so that I could be confident that she's getting the nutrition she needs. In the past she's eaten Wellness and Natural Balance kibble, both of which I think are good brands. But she was prone to ear infections and some kind of gunk that would build up in her ears if I didn't keep cleaning them with salicylic acid. She hated having her ears cleaned and would have to be baited with treats and tackled. She'd wake us up a few times a night shaking her head and making her ears go flappity flap flap. So the vet said to try a simple diet to see if she had a food allergy. I did, and the flapping and irritation ceased. Her ears became naturally clean somehow.  She was on a chicken and/or fish and eggs diet before she went veg. She still gets duck and chicken eggs, plus the insects she catches (I can't stop her). I found that whether her diet is vegetarian or not, as long as it's simple and homemade she is healthy. She always had a nice coat, lots of energy and ideal weight, but the ear thing seems to be associated with any brand of commercial food.

Her current diet consists of recipes combining Vegepet supplements with a selection of these ingredients:

-Quinoa
-Brown rice
-Millet
-Flax seeds, ground
-A green vegetable like spinach, kale, green beans or broccoli
-Garbanzo beans
-Lentils
-Oats or whole grains not listed above
-Nuts, ground
-Olive or canola oil (or coconut oil when I can afford it)
-Chicken or duck eggs if she's lucky

Now I don't have to put on plastic gloves, prepare meat that nobody else in the house eats, and disinfect everything the raw meat touched. I can go back to my regular habit of leaving the kitchen dirty. It's not hard to prepare and pretty cheap, especially since these are all things the whole family eats and we buy them in bulk.

Freakslist pic du jour

Really?

I don't know who this person is, and won't say where the post originated other than it's a freakslist ad and the pony isn't for sale. The pony's cute.  And the owner came closer to spelling "conformation" correctly than most people do. And she's wearing a helmet, so she has that going for her. But - do I have to point this out? - why would a grownup post a picture of herself barefoot, wearing a bathing suit and standing on a pony? I see it a lot. Is this a thing? I'm all for going barefoot, but not around horses.

Then again, who's the bigger idiot for looking at pics of horses to avoid working at 6 a.m.? Don't answer that.

Semantics: more important than I used to think

My in-laws come from Midwestern U.S. farm families, and some raised or still raise cattle or pigs for meat. I learned that the ones who raise pigs don't like to be called pig farmers or ranchers or breeders, but pork producers. They're not the type of people you see in the undercover footage of farm workers who actually seem to hate the animals and are deliberately violent; in fact, most of my in-laws and their extended family are responsible pet owners and all are friendly and caring.

But animals raised for food are deliberately objectified as their end product: pork, beef, fryers, etc. My theory is that at least some people need this label to be able to distance themselves from the fact that the meat is made out of what was once a living, breathing creature with feelings and reactions of varying complexity. The similarity of the feelings to human emotions can be debated, but there's no denying that if they're not vegetable or mineral, they feel. Businesses are referred to as "egg producers" or "pork producers," but the real producers are animals. If we want this stuff they produce, it is hard for most of us who didn't grow up in farm country to consider its source in detail. For me, it isn't worth all the resources and dirty jobs needed to get that stuff to the grocery store, because I don't need or want to eat it. But I understand few people feel that way, and I would be very lonely if I didn't know, love and respect people who don't think the way I do about everything. They don't condemn me for not buying the products their families sell.

Dairy: breast milk from a cow or goat ("breast milk" is redundant, but by default the word "milk" without "breast" means "from a cow")
Process: slaughter and butcher
Grass-finished beef : meat from an animal who grazed on fresh forage instead of grain
Game hen: a chicken slaughtered young; to be fair, it's probably better than being an actual game bird and fighting

I'm conflicted because I'm not against having domestic animals or agriculture on a small scale, it just got out of hand and became dehumanizing. If we have to numb ourselves a little or deny ourselves information to consume what we do, maybe it's because many people are sensitive, but love or think they need meats. Maybe for others it's because they feel entitled to the products, and are uninterested in the processes that get it from farm to drive-thru. And for a lot of families it's extremely hard to afford and prepare better food. There must be a lot of things I'm ignorant about and use every day, so I'm not as different from any of those examples as I would like to think. I recently found out my synthetic leather riding boots were made from a petroleum product and their existence probably does more harm to the world that 1000 acres of Monsanto corn. It shouldn't have been a surprise - what would they be made out of, recycled tires?

You don't want to be a pig in your next life. At least, though, it would be a short life and you could move on to your next incarnation. Once the creating and killing of animals became as efficient and automated as the assembly lines in factories, we all became a little less human.

Open source software

So far I think I like this: http://www.digitalvolcano.co.uk/content/duplicate-cleaner  for cleaning duplicate files in a Windows OS.

I love ccleaner (piriform.com) and thank Black Swan Image Works (http://www.bsiw.us/) for introducing me to it.

After two whole years, I still like malwarebytes for sweeping internet bacteria that your paid antivirus didn't get.

Comodo is very effective at blocking malware, although its "Danger, Will Robinson!" messages can be disturbing or annoying.

Open Office (or Star Office) is still my office suite of choice (vs. MS Office with Word, Excel, ect.) after 12 years. But it can be a little buggy, resource hogging and slow to start. For tips on how to remedy this:
Linux - http://the11throck.wordpress.com/2008/01/12/make-openoffice-startup-faster/

http://yamz.wordpress.com/2009/05/12/how-to-make-openoffice-org-go-faster/

Still, I didn't pay for it. As opposed to having paid for it. It hasn't wasted enough of my billable time to justify buying slightly less bloated but limited software that produces over sized files (I can't keep saying bloated).

For an exhaustive discussion of OO being bloatware: http://slashdot.org/story/05/10/27/1425232/OpenOffice-Bloated

Toddler logic

Every parent thinks people want to hear about the cute stuff their kids do or say, so why should I be any different? EG is funnier than me anyway. Babies and robots are very similar. You have to consider how they will process information you give them without any life experience. The logic is sound though:

-If something isn't plugged in, then it must be plugged out.
-If you go outside and it's hot your cheeks get a little red. If you go outside without sunblock and it's hot, your cheeks get a big red.
-If playing drums is drumming, then playing guitar is guitaring.
-Something you stub your toe on is called a stubber.

Marriage equality

Tweeted by @CareNews - this article says some New York politicians who were previously on the fence about a bill that would give all marriages the same status whether the spouses are opposing genders or not are now supportive of it. I have never heard a good argument for requiring that married couples consist of one male and one female spouse. Homophobia is a hot topic and deserves a lot of discussion, but the other underlying issue is defining gender. Several years ago someone I was talking to (probably about the whole baby boys wearing blue and girls wearing pink thing) pointed out that gender isn't just one or the other. It's a range, with male being on one end of the spectrum and female on the other. You can fall anywhere on that spectrum and be defined by the characteristics that dominate. You can also change gender. I talked to a writer who over the years had befriended two transgendered people, both female to male. One had been married to a man and the other a lesbian before the change, so they became a straight man and a gay man. Very few people can say they've had the experience of being both a married woman and a gay man.

But you can't have a public restroom for each of these sub-genders, so it's easiest to just divide them into potties for people with wieners and potties for people who cannot pee standing up.  Summary: genders being opposite is really, really important to us, for better or for worse.

And for people who will never recognize a marriage between two people of the same sex, I want to say, "evolve."  But I do understand it being hard to accept from this perspective: a marriage with more than two people would really make me squirm. I would feel like my right to practice monogamy would be somehow threatened, and I don't know why.

80s dream

Last night I had a dream I was talking to a friend I hadn't seen in 20 years. We were remembering the eighties, and I was wearing a t-shirt that said "Hey Bud, Let's Party." I don't know where that came from, because I wouldn't have thought of it while awake. I don't think I had one of those shirts or ever even quoted Jeff Spiccoli.

Products I Don't Like

1. Any yogurt marketed for kids/babies. I don't eat yogurt but Masher and EG do, and they love plain yogurt. There's no reason to put 20-some grams of sugar into a little kid's yogurt, or into a little kid. Anyone who works at Horizon Dairy in Marketing should babysit for me after giving EG a container of that stuff.
2. Retractable leashes: This might have been a good idea when it first came out and people bought them for microdogs. I don't think it was intended for dogs that aren't trained to walk nicely on a loose lead. I sympathize with people whose dogs pull on the lead because mine was nearly impossible to train out of it. What the retractable leash does is give them 16 feet to build up more momentum when they pull on the lead, making the force on your rotator cuff that much greater. And if they're out of control at 6 feet, they're both out of control and out of reach at 16 feet. Plus they tend to get tangled in other leashes when sniffing other dogs' butts and going in a circle.

Disclaimer: I'm not a vegan

I'm hoping this blog will generate some traffic and my comments on products will help producers of vegetarian products, especially vegan ones, to reach their market(s). But I'm not a vegan by any definition because I make exceptions for:

-Eggs that come from my friends' chickens and ducks
-Anything Masher, the one who gave up meat when we got married, makes me even if he puts butter in it

Products I Like

1. Sunshine Burger: http://www.sunshineburger.com/  these have only a few simple ingredients. They are vegan and gluten-free (although I have nothing against gluten). I like the texture and the unique taste; it's not one of those imitation meats, but a veggie patty, so it's not really for converts looking for a meat substitute. EG doesn't like them though. He spit out the one he tried.
2. Veganaisse: taste close enough to mayo, and the texture is very similar. I've tried other fake mayo and the texture wasn't velvety and it gagged me.
3. Vegan Gourmet "cheese" good texture, and I like the white ones (mozzarella and monterey jack). It melts and you can make a grilled "cheese" with it.
4. Boo Bars: http://boobars.com/ very simple fruit and nut bars with no ingredients you can't pronounce. If you're a vegan who likes chocolate (I'm not, so I didn't try that flavor), the ones with cocoa are also vegan. I guess I'm not crazy about the name only because without a hyphen in the domain I just see "boob." Not that there's anything wrong with that, it just makes me think it's breastfeeding forum or something instead of a snack food.

Buddhist Passover, and why I blog in the first place

In another brilliant entry from Cakewrecks , I posted a comment someone thought was funny and she said she clicked on my linky but my blog was blocked. Actually, I hadn't started it. So I thought if someone was actually going to read it, I would find something to write about. The Cakewrecks subject of the day was the irony of Wreckorators creating actual cakes - regular ones with baking soda, frosting, white flour, etc. - and writing Passover greetings on them. Of course, this touched off a heated debate about whether any other religion has a proper Seder. Most of it was hilarious, and about 20% of commentators took the subject way too seriously and missed the humor entrely. I call these people irony-impaired. This was my contribution: "OK, I'll join the fray just to get this alternative Seder thing straight. The important thing to know is that ingredients aren't allowed. Matzo is a cracker without any ingredients. For our Buddhist Seder, we hide a piece of it, which is easy because it doesn't have any ingredients and therefore doesn't exist. Finding it is like describing the sound of one hand clapping."

Apparently this was funny so I'm very proud of myself.  For the record, I'm not Buddhist or even religious, but mean no disrespect to anyone who is.

What is a caterpiggle?

I came downstairs one evening and my toddler, EvilGenius ("EG") and my spouse, Masher, were ROTFL saying, "Caterpiggle! Caterpiggle!" I don't know what they were talking about but I drew a caterpiggle, thinking it probably looks like a caterpillar with a pig face. Since EG can pronounce "caterpillar" I thought he was just being silly and clever. As it turns out, it was from a Caillou episode in which the little bald boy helps his little sister Rosie overcome a fear of insects. Oh well, too late, it's now my blog title. I hope the Quebecois producers of Caillou don't mind.